"Just as people take pride in things for which they have no responsibility (such as famous ancestors, national championships of their sports teams, and great accomplishments of their nation), so, too, must these people accept the shame (but not the guilt) of their family, their athletic teams, and their nation."
This is one of many penetrating insights in On Apology by Aaron Lazare. Thinking about it, I realized it can also be inverted. People like me who take on the shame of (in this case) our faith and association, must also take pride in it. And I do. If I didn't, I wouldn't stay.
I know I'm far from alone in taking pride in Unitarian Universalism. My prayer is that I'm not as alone as I often feel in accepting our shame.
Monday, February 05, 2007
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2 comments:
I don't know that I agree with that. If I am proud of an ancestor - or proud to be a descendant of an ancestor - it doesn't mean that I am taking credit for their work. It means that I take special interest in what they've done, that I want to highlight it or that it makes me feel good.
You can be proud of someone else, but shame seems like something that you carry around within yourself, about yourself. Can I be ashamed for someone else? Maybe I'm not understanding the meaning of the word.
I gravitate to Lavar's juxtaposition, but I must admit the word "shame" gave me pause too. I think what's important here is his saying shame without guilt. That's a very unusual separation, since in my experience shame either carries guilt or fear of being perceived as guilty.
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